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    Religion: Difference between revisions

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    [[Buddhism]] ''Shit happens.''
    [[Buddhism]] ''Shit happens.''


    [[Wikipedia:Baptist|Baptist]] [[Wikipedia:Fundamentalism|Fundamentalism]] ''Shit happens because the [[Bible]] says so.''
    [[Wikipedia:Baptist|Baptist]] [[Wikipedia:Fundamentalism|Fundamentalism]] ''Shit happens because the [[Wikipedia:Bible|Bible]] says so.''


    [[Capitalism]] ''How much is this shit?''
    [[Capitalism]] ''How much is this shit?''
    Line 27: Line 27:
    [[Wikipedia:Catholicism|Catholicism]] ''If shit happens, you deserved it.''
    [[Wikipedia:Catholicism|Catholicism]] ''If shit happens, you deserved it.''


    Classical [[Wikipedia:Marxism|Marxism]] ''The workers take all the shit, but they're gonna dish it back out again.''
    Classical [[Wikipedia:Marxism|Marxism]] ''The workers take all the shit, but they're gonna dish it back out again.'' OR ''The workers take all the shit in [[Wikipedia:Capitalism|capitalistic]] systems, nationalize it during [[Wikipedia:Socialism|Socialism]] but will distribute it equally when [[Wikipedia:Communism|Communism]] is established.''


    [[Communism]] ''It's everybody's shit.''
    [[Wikipedia:Communism|Communism]] ''It's everybody's shit.''


    [[Wikipedia:Confucianism|Confucianism]] ''Confucius say, "Shit happens."''
    [[Wikipedia:Confucianism|Confucianism]] ''Confucius say, "Shit happens."''
    Line 66: Line 66:


    [[Wikipedia:Narcissism|Narcissism]] ''My shit don't stink.''
    [[Wikipedia:Narcissism|Narcissism]] ''My shit don't stink.''

    [[Wikipedia:Neo-Marxism|Neo-Marxism]] ''Shit is a product of social oppression and false needs, produced by advertising and politics.''


    [[Wikipedia:Nietzsche|Nietzsche]] ''If you're not [[Wikipedia:Ubermensch|Ubermenschen]], you're not shit.''
    [[Wikipedia:Nietzsche|Nietzsche]] ''If you're not [[Wikipedia:Ubermensch|Ubermenschen]], you're not shit.''
    Line 73: Line 75:
    [[Wikipedia:Richard_Nixon|Noxonism]] ''Shit didn't happen, and if it did, I don't know anything about it.''
    [[Wikipedia:Richard_Nixon|Noxonism]] ''Shit didn't happen, and if it did, I don't know anything about it.''


    [[Google:Nonsequiturism|Nonsequiturism]] ''Route 176 goes south.'' (UH?)
    [[Wikipedia:Non_sequitur_%28logic%29|Nonsequiturism]] ''Route 176 goes south.'' (UH?)


    [[Wikipedia:Objectivism|Objectivism]] ([[Wikipedia:Ayn Rand|Ayn Rand]]) ''Shit is Shit.''
    [[Wikipedia:Objectivism|Objectivism]] ([[Wikipedia:Ayn Rand|Ayn Rand]]) ''Shit is Shit.''
    Line 85: Line 87:
    [[Wikipedia:Protestantism|Protestantism]] ''Let shit happen to someone else.''
    [[Wikipedia:Protestantism|Protestantism]] ''Let shit happen to someone else.''


    RASTAFARIAN Shit happens, but if it's all right with Jah, it's all right with me.
    [[Wikipedia:Rastafarianism|Rastafarianism]] ''Shit happens, but if it's all right with Jah, it's all right with me'' OR ''"Let's smoke this shit."''


    ROBINISM (tv) Holy shit Batman!
    [[Wikipedia:Robin (comics)|Robinism]] ''Holy shit [[Wikipedia:Batman|Batman]]!''


    RUSSEAU Only natural shit is worth shit.
    [[Wikipedia:Jean-Jacques Rousseau|Rousseau]] ''Only natural shit is worth shit.''


    [[Wikipedia:Shinto|Shintoism]] ''Shit is everywhere. So as long as you're stepping in it, show it some respect.''
    Rastafarianism "Let's smoke this shit."


    [[Wikipedia:Burrhus Frederic Skinner|Skinnerism]] ''If eat then shit.''
    SHINTO Shit is everywhere. So as long as you're stepping in it, show it some respect.


    [[Solipsism]] ''All this shit is a creation of my imagination.'' OR ''The only thing I can be sure of is that my shit happens.''
    SKINNERISM If eat then shit.


    [[Wikipedia:Spoonerism|Spoonerism]] ''Hit shappens.''
    SOLIPSISM All this shit is a creation of my imagination.


    [[Wikipedia:Stalinism|Stalinism]] ''The state treats you like shit.''
    SOLIPSISM The only thing I can be sure of is that my shit happens.


    [[Subgenius]] ''Bob happens -- SO GIVE ME SOME SLACK!''
    SPOONERISM Hit shappens.


    [[Wikipedia:Surrealism|Surrelism]] ''Shit is shiny and shaped like a buick.''
    STALINISM The state treats you like shit.


    [[Wikipedia:Scientific_Creationism|Scientific Creationism]] ''Shit happens all at once''
    SUBGENIUS Bob happens -- SO GIVE ME SOME SLACK!


    [[Wikipedia:Secular Humanism|Secular-Humanism]] ''Shit happens, but there's a rational explanation.''
    SURREALISM Shit is shiny and shaped like a buick.


    [[Wikipedia:Taoism|Taoism]] ''The shit that happens is not the true shit.''
    Scientific-Creationism Shit happens all at once


    [[Wikipedia:The Force|THE-FORCE]] ''Do not be swayed by the Dark Side of the shit.''
    Secular-Humanism Shit happens, but there's a rational explanation.


    [[TV]]-[[Wikipedia:Evangelism|Evangelism]] ''You need our shit, but it'll cost you.''
    TAOISM The shit that happens is not the true shit.


    [[Wikipedia:Unitarianism|Unitarianism]] ''There's only one shit, but you can have it happen any way you want.''
    THE-FORCE Do not be swayed by the Dark Side of the shit.


    [[Wikipedia:Utilitarianism|Utilitarianism]] ''Do that which generates the greatest shit for the greatest number.''
    TV-Evangelism you need our shit, but it'll cost you.


    [[Wikipedia:Vandalism|Vandalism]] ''I'm gonna wreck this shit!''
    UNITARIANISM There's only one shit, but you can have it happen any way you want.


    [[Wikipedia:Voodoo|Voodooism]] ''Shit doesn't just happen - somebody dumped it on you''
    Utilitarianism Do that which generates the greatest shit for the greatest number.


    [[Wikipedia:Zeno's paradoxes|Xeno's paradox]] ''It's logically impossible for shit to happen.''
    VANDALISM I'm gonna wreck this shit!


    [[Wikipedia:Yuppie|Yuppieism]] ''It's my shit! All mine!''
    VOODOOISM Shit doesn't just happen - somebody dumped it on you


    [[Zen]] ''What is the sound of shit happening?''
    Xeno's paradox It's logically impossible for shit to happen.


    === COMPARATIVE ANALYSIS OF WORLD RELIGIOUS PHILOSOPHIES ===
    YUPPIEISM It's my shit! All mine!


    [[Wikipedia:Taoism|Taoism]] ''Shit Happens''
    ZEN What is the sound of shit happening?


    [[Wikipedia:Confucianism|Confucianism]] ''Confucius says, "Shit Happens."''
    COMPARATIVE ANALYSIS OF WORLD RELIGIOUS PHILOSOPHIES


    [[Zen]] What is the sound of shit happening?
    TAOISM Shit Happens


    [[Yoga]] There's a full lotus shit happening.
    CONFUCIANISM Confucius says, "Shit Happens."


    [[Wikipedia:Transcendental_Meditation|Transcendental Meditation]] ''Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit.......''
    ZEN What is the sound of shit happening?


    [[Wikipedia:Hinduism|Hinduism]] ''This shit has happened before.''
    YOGA There's a full lotus shit happening.


    [[Wikipedia:Islam|Islam]] ''If shit happens, it is the will of Allah.''
    TRANSCENDENTAL MEDITATION Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit.......


    [[Wikipedia:Catholicism|Catholicism]] ''If shit happens, you deserve it.''
    HINDUISM This shit has happened before.


    ISLAM If shit happens, it is the will of Allah.
    [[Wikipedia:Fundamentalism|Fundamentalism]] ''If shit happens, they deserve it.''


    [[Wikipedia:Protestantism|Protestantism]] ''Let shit happen to someone else.''
    CATHOLICISM If shit happens, you deserve it.


    FUNDAMENTALISM If shit happens, they deserve it.
    [[Wikipedia:Episcopalianism|Episcopalianism]] ''When shit happens, make it tasteful.''


    PROTESTANTISM Let shit happen to someone else.
    [[Wikipedia:Judaism|Judaism]] ''Why does shit always happen to US?''


    [[Wikipedia:Mormonism|Mormonism]] ''Shit's going to happen. Stockpile.''
    EPISCOPALIANISM When shit happens, make it tasteful.


    [[Wikipedia:Unitarianism|Unitarianism]] ''Deal with your own shit happening.''
    JUDAISM Why does shit always happen to US?


    [[Wikipedia:Twelve-step program|Twelve-step programs]] ''We're powerless over shit. Turn shit over.''
    MORMONISM Shit's going to happen. Stockpile.


    [[Wikipedia:Astrology|Astrology]] ''Uranus transits.''
    UNITARIANISM Deal with your own shit happening.


    TWELVE STEP PROGRAMS. We're powerless over shit. Turn shit over.
    [[Wikipedia:Perestroika|Perestroika]] ''We can't control shit. Let shit happen.''


    [[Agnostic|Agnosticism]] ''Shit may or may not be happening; we don't know shit.''
    ASTROLOGY Uranus transits.


    [[Wikipedia:Atheism|Atheism]] ''No shit.''
    PERESTROIKA We can't control shit. Let shit happen.


    [[Gnostic|Gnosticism]] ''Know shit.''
    AGNOSTICISM Shit may or may not be happening; we don't know shit.


    [[Yoism]] ''Shit is open source''
    ATHEISM No shit.

    GNOSTICISM Know shit.


    === Own additions ===
    === Own additions ===


    [[Wikipedia:Absenteeism|Absenteeism]] ''I'm not gonna be there when shit happens''
    [[Wikipedia:Absenteeism|Absenteeism]] ''I'm not gonna be there when shit happens'' ([http://www.tte-buecherei.de/cgi-bin/tte.pl?search=Absenteismus Absenteismus. Die Kunst des Krankfeierns in den italienischen Klassenkämpfen.])


    [[Nuwaubianism]] ''Shit comes from Dr.Seuss''

    [[Oomoto|Oomotism]] ''I feel sorry for my shit, it should see something beautiful.'' ([[Onisaburo Deguchi]])

    ----


    --> [[:Category:Religion]]
    --> [[:Category:Religion]]

    [http://www.okcupid.com/tests/take?testid=16997232335198460795 The Which Cult Should You Join? Test]

    [http://youtube.com/watch?v=MeSSwKffj9o George Carlin on Religion]


    [[Category:Religion]]
    [[Category:Religion]]
    [[Category:Isms]]

    Latest revision as of 10:09, 6 October 2007

    You probably already know this but i still liked to have it on here, cause its funny and to some extent really contains info to compare religions,doesnt it?

    Shit Happens - Comparing world religions, philosophies & ideologies[edit]

    THE COMPLETE AND UNCENSORED SHIT LIST[edit]

    Agnosticism What is this shit?

    Altruism Want some shit?

    Amish Shit dost occur.

    Apatheism I don't give a shit.

    Atheism I don't believe this shit.

    Bahá'í All shit is truly shit.

    Buddhism Shit happens.

    Baptist Fundamentalism Shit happens because the Bible says so.

    Capitalism How much is this shit?

    Cartesianism I shit, therefore I am.

    Catholicism If shit happens, you deserved it.

    Classical Marxism The workers take all the shit, but they're gonna dish it back out again. OR The workers take all the shit in capitalistic systems, nationalize it during Socialism but will distribute it equally when Communism is established.

    Communism It's everybody's shit.

    Confucianism Confucius say, "Shit happens."

    Creation science We have proof that God created all the shit that happens.

    Contract theory If we don't agree to form society, everything will go to shit.

    DADISM Your mom knows her shit. (did he mean Dadaism?) (or maybe Neo-Dadism;))

    Darwinism We came up from shit.

    Descartes I shit therefore I am.

    Dianetics Shit your way to a better life.

    Dominicans Believe in shit, or we'll boil you in it.

    Dyslexianism Hits shapnep.

    Discordianism This MIGHT be shit, but is instead a fuzzy 1955 Mustang.

    Logical-Positivism Shit = S+H+I+T

    Marines It's not just shit, it's an adventure.

    McCarthyism Are you now, or have you ever been, shit? (-> Neo-mccarthyism)

    Mennonite None of this modern shit now.

    Momism You'll eat this shit and like it!

    Mormonism Your shit is shit, but our shit is the ONE TRUE shit.

    Murphyism Shit always happens at the worst possible time and place.

    Narcissism My shit don't stink.

    Neo-Marxism Shit is a product of social oppression and false needs, produced by advertising and politics.

    Nietzsche If you're not Ubermenschen, you're not shit.

    Nihilism Everything is shit.

    Noxonism Shit didn't happen, and if it did, I don't know anything about it.

    Nonsequiturism Route 176 goes south. (UH?)

    Objectivism (Ayn Rand) Shit is Shit.

    Paganism Shit happens. And is a part of nature.

    Panglossianism This is the best of all possible shits.

    Platonism There is an ideal shit, of which all the shit that happens is but an imperfect image.

    Protestantism Let shit happen to someone else.

    Rastafarianism Shit happens, but if it's all right with Jah, it's all right with me OR "Let's smoke this shit."

    Robinism Holy shit Batman!

    Rousseau Only natural shit is worth shit.

    Shintoism Shit is everywhere. So as long as you're stepping in it, show it some respect.

    Skinnerism If eat then shit.

    Solipsism All this shit is a creation of my imagination. OR The only thing I can be sure of is that my shit happens.

    Spoonerism Hit shappens.

    Stalinism The state treats you like shit.

    Subgenius Bob happens -- SO GIVE ME SOME SLACK!

    Surrelism Shit is shiny and shaped like a buick.

    Scientific Creationism Shit happens all at once

    Secular-Humanism Shit happens, but there's a rational explanation.

    Taoism The shit that happens is not the true shit.

    THE-FORCE Do not be swayed by the Dark Side of the shit.

    TV-Evangelism You need our shit, but it'll cost you.

    Unitarianism There's only one shit, but you can have it happen any way you want.

    Utilitarianism Do that which generates the greatest shit for the greatest number.

    Vandalism I'm gonna wreck this shit!

    Voodooism Shit doesn't just happen - somebody dumped it on you

    Xeno's paradox It's logically impossible for shit to happen.

    Yuppieism It's my shit! All mine!

    Zen What is the sound of shit happening?

    COMPARATIVE ANALYSIS OF WORLD RELIGIOUS PHILOSOPHIES[edit]

    Taoism Shit Happens

    Confucianism Confucius says, "Shit Happens."

    Zen What is the sound of shit happening?

    Yoga There's a full lotus shit happening.

    Transcendental Meditation Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit.......

    Hinduism This shit has happened before.

    Islam If shit happens, it is the will of Allah.

    Catholicism If shit happens, you deserve it.

    Fundamentalism If shit happens, they deserve it.

    Protestantism Let shit happen to someone else.

    Episcopalianism When shit happens, make it tasteful.

    Judaism Why does shit always happen to US?

    Mormonism Shit's going to happen. Stockpile.

    Unitarianism Deal with your own shit happening.

    Twelve-step programs We're powerless over shit. Turn shit over.

    Astrology Uranus transits.

    Perestroika We can't control shit. Let shit happen.

    Agnosticism Shit may or may not be happening; we don't know shit.

    Atheism No shit.

    Gnosticism Know shit.

    Yoism Shit is open source

    Own additions[edit]

    Absenteeism I'm not gonna be there when shit happens (Absenteismus. Die Kunst des Krankfeierns in den italienischen Klassenkämpfen.)

    Nuwaubianism Shit comes from Dr.Seuss

    Oomotism I feel sorry for my shit, it should see something beautiful. (Onisaburo Deguchi)


    --> Category:Religion

    The Which Cult Should You Join? Test

    George Carlin on Religion

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